Yarrgh, ye scurvy dog!
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On February 6, 2008, the sea-bitten thebobsfan said:
A pirate and his crew were busy plundering a ship. When he entered the captain's quarters, he saw the captain hunched over a table, obviously deep in thought. When the captain didn't move, the pirate came closer with cutlass raised, but stopped short when he noticed that the captain was involved in a game of chess ... with a parrot! The pirate watched for a few seconds, and soon the captain made a move. "Good move! Good move!" the parrot cried, "Nice! Nice!"

Well, needless to say, the pirate was quite impressed. "Arrgh, matey! That be quite the talented parrot ye be playin' against thar," he said.

The captain looked up at the pirate, somewhat startled, as he had been so involved with the game that he had not noticed the tar standing there. "Ahh, he's not so smart," he replied, "I've beaten the blighter two out of three." (Bah-dum-dum)

"So what would the bird do if ye made a blunder?" asked the pirate.

"Somersaults," was the quick reply.

"Somersaults?" the pirate said, "That be incredble! How many would it be doin' then?"

"That would depend on how hard I slap him."
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From: Just me reworking old jokes
On September 15, 2007, one-eyed Marc Whitcombe said:
A pirate captain goes up to his first mate after a raid on a coastal village;
"A good haul I hope" says the captain.
"I'm afraid not captain," replied the first mate. "I think we picked a poor village to raid," he continued.
"What!" exclaimed the captain, "How much money did you get?"
"All we found were a few copper coins," replied the first mate.
"Did you try the church? Did they have any fine tapestries or Holy treasures?" asked the Captain.
"All we got was a wooden alter," replied the first mate.
"What about the farms?" asked the captain. "Did they have any animals we can eat, or sell at market?"
"One donkey" replied the first mate.
"One donkey!" exclaimed the Captain.
"Aaaargh" replied the first mate, and he continued .................
.................
.................
(Wait for it)
.................
.................
"It was the only bray in the pillage."
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From: Wrote it for a review of a pirate related ride on my own website.
On August 11, 2007, the sea-bitten Pirate Jenny said:
There once was a pirate named Bates,
Who danced the Fandango on skates.
He fell on his cutlass
Which rendered him nutless
And practically useless on dates!
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From: Can't remember
On August 10, 2007, scurvy knave The-Captin-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named said:
One pirate said to his fellow crewmate, "Arrrgh, that be a fine looking hook and peg leg ye got for ye'self!"

The pirate replied, "I should think so, it cost me and arm and a leg!"
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On August 3, 2007, the most piratical Annie Cook said:
After the storm the pirate captain was marooned on a deserted island. As he explored his desolate surroundings, he noticed that he couldn't find any wildlife.

There was plenty of fresh water, an abundance of coconuts and tropical fruit, and even a nice cache of rum. Finally, after days of searching, he thought he heard the sound of a chicken clucking.

When he found the source of the sound it was actually a parrot prancing around making the clucking sounds of a chicken.

The pirate told the parrot "Stop that clucking. You're not a chicken. You're a parrot. There are no chickens on this bloody island."

The parrot ignored him and continued to prance around saying "Cluck, cluck, cluck, I'm a chicken. I'm a chicken."

The pirate couldn't believe how stupid the parrot was, so he repeated, "I said, stop that clucking! You're not a chicken! You're a parrot! There are no chickens on this bloody island!"

The parrot ignored him again and pranced around saying "Cluck, cluck, cluck, I'm a chicken. I'm a chicken."

The pirate took out his knife and this time he said "I'm really hungry, I think I'll eat this stupid chicken!"

As the parrot flew away, he squawked "I'm a parrot! I'm a parrot! There are no stupid chickens on this bloody island!"
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From: Me cousin who had him a clucking parrot