Yarrgh, ye scurvy dog!
Pirate booty! Pirate merchandise for sale

ARRRRtichoke Tote Bag


On January 23, 2014, the scurvy Morien Jones said:
What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?
I, I, R, and the 7 Cs.
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On October 14, 2007, barnacle bitten D. Sellers, Franklin, TN said:
How does a pirate tell his wench he wants to have sex?
Drop yer sails and prepare t' be boarded!
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From: At work I do a lot of driving. It gives me time to think, and that leads to thinking about pirates. For some reason, "prepare to be boarded" got into my head. I then thought it would be a good punchline. So, I just came up with the joke.
On October 17, 2005, salty ol' Tim said:
So, there's this pirate ship in the midst of a long voyage. The men have grown terribly bored. A pirate amongst them happens to know a bunch of magic tricks, and he decides to put on a magic show. His parrot, however, is quite gossipy and can't keep it's mouth shut.

The pirate begins his first trick, and tha parrot gives it away by saying "rawwk, the coin is in the other hand, rawwk!"

Frustrated, the pirate tries another trick, but again, the parrot gives it away by blurting out "rawwk, look under the table, rawwk!"

This goes on for some time, to a point that the pirate can't manage to perform anything spectacular to entertain the crew. His anger towards his blabbermouth parrot eventually grows so phenomenal that one night he gets very drunk and accidentally crashes the ship into some rocks.

Sobering up the next morning, he finds himself adrift on some wreckage. The parrot, ever the attentive sidekick, happens to land next to him looking quite puzzled. It says to him:

"Rawwk, Okay, I give up, What'd ya do with the boat?"
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From: Not sure....
On May 8, 2006, scurvy knave Cook of naval vessel "The IncapacitatAAAAAHHHHR" said:
What do pirates do in the evenings?
Your mothAAAHHHRRRRR!!
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From: me
On August 4, 2006, one-eyed Shananigans said:
What does a bleached blonde and a pirate have in common?
A little black patch.
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On September 18, 2013, scurvy dog Beth Sparks said:
How does a pirate ask for a date?
Arrrr you busy tonight?
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From: My niece, at age 9
On August 10, 2007, the dreaded The-Captin-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named said:
One pirate said to his fellow crewmate, "Arrrgh, that be a fine looking hook and peg leg ye got for ye'self!"

The pirate replied, "I should think so, it cost me and arm and a leg!"
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On July 31, 2014, barnacle bitten Curtis said:
On a pirate ship in high seas, the First Mate was on lookout for hazards from the crow's nest. Suddenly, the ship was broadsided by a rogue wave, tossing the Mate from the nest! He crashed through the upper deck and landed square into the Captain's quarters. The Captain, surprised, says "Matey, ye be hurt!?"

"Narrrr Cap'n," replied the First Mate, "I've been through hardships before!"
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From: Oregon
On September 19, 2005, salty ol' Cap'n Karikas said:
Where can you find a pirate who has lost his wooden legs?
Right where you left him.
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On March 19, 2005, regular scallywag Cap'n Karikas said:
What has 8 legs, 8 arms and 8 eyes?
8 pirates.
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