Yarrgh, ye scurvy dog!
Pirate booty! Pirate merchandise for sale

ARRRRtichoke Tote Bag


On February 23, 2006, one-legged Anita said:
How do you know if you are a Pirate?
You don't, you just AAARRRRRGH!
Rate this joke!
Rate this salty joke a 1 (currently 3.4583)Rate this salty joke a 2 (currently 3.4583)Rate this salty joke a 3 (currently 3.4583)Rate this salty joke a 4 (currently 3.4583)Rate this salty joke a 5 (currently 3.4583)
From: A land lubbin matey of mine
On June 21, 2007, the scurvy BrianYeButcher said:
The people that make all of these ARR! jokes should be what?
ARRested!
Rate this joke!
Rate this salty joke a 1 (currently 3.4503)Rate this salty joke a 2 (currently 3.4503)Rate this salty joke a 3 (currently 3.4503)Rate this salty joke a 4 (currently 3.4503)Rate this salty joke a 5 (currently 3.4503)
From: The Questionable Humor Of Others
On March 30, 2012, captain Anonymous Pirate said:
What does a Priate wear in the winter......
His SCAAAAAARF!
Rate this joke!
Rate this salty joke a 1 (currently 3.449)Rate this salty joke a 2 (currently 3.449)Rate this salty joke a 3 (currently 3.449)Rate this salty joke a 4 (currently 3.449)Rate this salty joke a 5 (currently 3.449)
From: London. England
On March 20, 2005, scurvy dog Cap'n Karikas said:
How did the pirate stop smoking?
He used the patch!
Rate this joke!
Rate this salty joke a 1 (currently 3.4444)Rate this salty joke a 2 (currently 3.4444)Rate this salty joke a 3 (currently 3.4444)Rate this salty joke a 4 (currently 3.4444)Rate this salty joke a 5 (currently 3.4444)
On June 10, 2011, chumbucket lickin' Captain Rita Book--Mistress of the C'hai Seas said:
What do Jewish Pirates say?
Ahoy vey!
Rate this joke!
Rate this salty joke a 1 (currently 3.3933)Rate this salty joke a 2 (currently 3.3933)Rate this salty joke a 3 (currently 3.3933)Rate this salty joke a 4 (currently 3.3933)Rate this salty joke a 5 (currently 3.3933)
On October 10, 2009, regular scallywag Courtland said:
Why don't pirates go to college?
Because they're C students!
Rate this joke!
Rate this salty joke a 1 (currently 3.3804)Rate this salty joke a 2 (currently 3.3804)Rate this salty joke a 3 (currently 3.3804)Rate this salty joke a 4 (currently 3.3804)Rate this salty joke a 5 (currently 3.3804)
From: it's been done
On September 19, 2005, regular scallywag Cap'n Karikas said:
Where can a pirate with two wooden legs go?
Not very fARRRRR!
Rate this joke!
Rate this salty joke a 1 (currently 3.3739)Rate this salty joke a 2 (currently 3.3739)Rate this salty joke a 3 (currently 3.3739)Rate this salty joke a 4 (currently 3.3739)Rate this salty joke a 5 (currently 3.3739)
On September 21, 2010, regular scallywag Hanserelli said:
How do pirates talk to each other?
Aye to Aye!! (while covering one eye)
Rate this joke!
Rate this salty joke a 1 (currently 3.3673)Rate this salty joke a 2 (currently 3.3673)Rate this salty joke a 3 (currently 3.3673)Rate this salty joke a 4 (currently 3.3673)Rate this salty joke a 5 (currently 3.3673)
From: booze
On September 19, 2006, the sea-bitten Bryce said:
A pirate was standing on the crow's nest and then he slipped and fell. He fell through the first floor, then he fell through the second floor, then he fell through the third floor and hit the bottom floor of the ship!

The first mate comes up to him and asks "Are ye all right matey?"

The pirate replies, "Arrr, yes... I've been through hardship before!"
Rate this joke!
Rate this salty joke a 1 (currently 3.345)Rate this salty joke a 2 (currently 3.345)Rate this salty joke a 3 (currently 3.345)Rate this salty joke a 4 (currently 3.345)Rate this salty joke a 5 (currently 3.345)
From: I made it up
On January 2, 2007, regular scallywag themagicman09 (edit by Captain Karikas) said:
There once was an old pirate captain, and this captain had a son who had no ears. One day the pirate captain picked up some new crew members. As the new recruits got on board the captain told them about his son, and that he was very sensitive about the fact that he had no ears. He said that if they offended his son by saying any thing about his ears they would have to walk the plank! The new pirates were naturally nervous about meeting this boy.

Well, after a while some of the pirates met the boy. The first pirate tried not to look at him, but he couldn't handle it and kept staring. The boy yelled "What are you looking at!?" Hurried to think of an excuse, the pirate said "I was just admiring your hand! Take care of your hand, or you will have to wear a hook like me." "Thank you for the advice", said the boy.

Soon a second pirate encoutered the boy. When he stared at the boy the boy said "What are you looking at!?" "I was just admiring your leg," said the pirate. "You take care of your leg, or you will have to wear a wooden leg like me!" "Thank you for the advice," said the boy.

Later a third pirate encountered the boy and stared. When the boy said "What are you looking at!?" the pirate said "I was just admiring your eyes. You take care of your eyes or you will have to wear glasses like me... and you can't wear glasses, because you don't have any ears to hold them up!"
Rate this joke!
Rate this salty joke a 1 (currently 3.3356)Rate this salty joke a 2 (currently 3.3356)Rate this salty joke a 3 (currently 3.3356)Rate this salty joke a 4 (currently 3.3356)Rate this salty joke a 5 (currently 3.3356)
Back one page, ye lilly-livered land lubber! Next page, ye scurvy curr