Yarrgh, ye scurvy dog!
Pirate booty! Pirate merchandise for sale

ARRRRtichoke Organic T


On August 14, 2006, land-lubber Scott said:
Why couldn't the pirates play cards?
The captain was standing on the deck!
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From: somewhere humourous...
On July 22, 2010, one-eyed James Craven said:
Why did the pirate go to the Apple store?
To buy an iPatch! (Aye Patch)
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From: Colin Cowherd, ESPN SportsNation
On May 13, 2014, one-legged Medicine Moll said:
What is a pirate's least favourite vegetable?
Leeks!
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From: Spanish waters
On August 22, 2010, the sea-bitten Cap'n Karikas said:
A large Humpback whale is lazily enjoying a beautiful day when he sees a female Humpback whale just a little ways off, and he thinks to himself that he's going to try to impress her...

He swims over to her, and breeches the surface, showing off the large hump on his back.

She looked unimpressed as she breached and showed a larger more well formed hump herself.

Now, a little embarrassed, he tries again to impress her by taking a breath and blowing a huge cloud of mist and water with a really nice rainbow in it.

Once again she looked unimpressed and she blew a larger cloud of mist, with a more beautiful rainbow.

Now clearly agitated, the Male sees a Navel vessel in the distance and races off toward it. Just before he collides with the ship, he dives, jumps out of the water and as he sails over the bow of the ship, he plucks a sailor off the deck and in one gulp swallows him whole!

He swam back to her very proud of himself, only to find the female object of his attentions with a disgusted look on her face...

As she swam off she said..."I'll Hump, I'll Blow, BUT I WON'T SWALLOW SEAMEN!
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On September 28, 2007, regular scallywag The BOBS Fan said:
What do you call a pirate with two eyes and two legs?
Rookie!
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From: Me own charred remains of a brain
On February 16, 2010, the most piratical Angel said:
What's a pirate's favorite letter?
You think it's the RRRRR, but it's the C that they're in love with!
Aye.
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From: Captain Yarrrrley
On January 28, 2007, the sea-bitten Sarah said:
What's Captain Hook's favorite store?
The Secondhand Shop!
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From: Webkinz.com
On July 27, 2006, the sea-bitten Jim V. said:
Did you hear about the pirate who took up boxing?
He had a killer left hook!
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From: Inspired by a "Rhymes With Orange" comic
On July 4, 2006, the dreaded jennifer brown breath said:
What does a pirate say when he has a heart attack?
Arrr! Me heartie!
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From: Who knows?
On March 19, 2005, the scurvy Cap'n Karikas said:
A little boy dresses up as a pirate for halloween. He has a bit of a speech impediment. The first house he goes to he says, "I'm a birate. This is my barrot. Can I have some bandy?" The woman looks at him and says, "My my aren't you cute. But where are your buccaneers?" The boy looks are her angrily and says "On the side of my buckin head you buckin dumass."
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