On March 24, 2008, the dreaded 99 Bottles of Beard said:
Why don't pirates go to the moon?
Because it's too FAAARRRRR!!!
From: a buddy · Link hearrrre!
Every joke in the hold
Showing jokes 256–270 of 995 scurvy jokes.
On March 23, 2008, land-lubber an Anonymous Pirate said:
What type of woman do pirates find most attractive?
Well, a HARRRRRrrrrrpie of course!!!!
On March 22, 2008, the scurvy Kurtis Williams said:
What brand of clothes do pirates wear?
Arrrrrrrrmani!
From: Made it up myself one rum drunkin night · Link hearrrre!
On March 20, 2008, the grog-addicted Amy said:
What does a French pirate say?
Weearrr! Weearrr!
From: Amy · Link hearrrre!
On March 17, 2008, regular scallywag Jarks said:
What's a pirate's biggest fear?
AAAARRGGHHHachnaphobia!
On March 9, 2008, seven-sea sailin' Pete Allegretta said:
Whats a pirate's favorite part of a birthday party?
Da-Balloons!
From: original · Link hearrrre!
On March 9, 2008, salty ol' Pete Allegretta said:
Where does the pirate put his cows?
In the BARNicle!
From: original · Link hearrrre!
On March 9, 2008, the dreaded Pete Allegretta said:
What did the pirate do when his friend stepped on his foot?
He became pi-rate!
From: original · Link hearrrre!
On March 9, 2008, land-lubber Pete Allegretta said:
What did the fortune teller use to read the pirate's fortune?
"Parrot" Cards!
From: original · Link hearrrre!
On February 26, 2008, chumbucket-lickin' smarty pants said:
What disease is a pirate most afraid of?
ARRRrrrrthritis!
From: my brain · Link hearrrre!
On February 25, 2008, scurvy dog iiawg the terrible! said:
How do pirates know that they are pirates?
They think, therefore they ARRRR!!!!!
From: I made it up. · Link hearrrre!
On February 22, 2008, seven-sea sailin' Dr. Charles G. Waugh said:
What do you call a beautiful pirate captain?
Davy Jones' looker!
From: original · Link hearrrre!
On February 19, 2008, land-lubber Shady Seide Cockswallow, a swashbuckling wench of New Orleans said:
What is a pirate's favorite radio program?
NParrrrgh... National Pirate Radio!
From: me · Link hearrrre!
On February 12, 2008, the sea-bitten sea-dog said:
How do pirate programs get input?
Through ARRRGV and ARRRGC!
From: I made it up, but I'm probably not the first · Link hearrrre!
On February 6, 2008, the most piratical thebobsfan said:
A pirate and his crew were busy plundering a ship. When he entered the captain's quarters, he saw the captain hunched over a table, obviously deep in thought. When the captain didn't move, the pirate came closer with cutlass raised, but stopped short when he noticed that the captain was involved in a game of chess ... with a parrot! The pirate watched for a few seconds, and soon the captain made a move. "Good move! Good move!" the parrot cried, "Nice! Nice!"
Well, needless to say, the pirate was quite impressed. "Arrgh, matey! That be quite the talented parrot ye be playin' against thar," he said.
The captain looked up at the pirate, somewhat startled, as he had been so involved with the game that he had not noticed the tar standing there. "Ahh, he's not so smart," he replied, "I've beaten the blighter two out of three." (Bah-dum-dum)
"So what would the bird do if ye made a blunder?" asked the pirate.
"Somersaults," was the quick reply.
"Somersaults?" the pirate said, "That be incredble! How many would it be doin' then?"
"That would depend on how hard I slap him."
Well, needless to say, the pirate was quite impressed. "Arrgh, matey! That be quite the talented parrot ye be playin' against thar," he said.
The captain looked up at the pirate, somewhat startled, as he had been so involved with the game that he had not noticed the tar standing there. "Ahh, he's not so smart," he replied, "I've beaten the blighter two out of three." (Bah-dum-dum)
"So what would the bird do if ye made a blunder?" asked the pirate.
"Somersaults," was the quick reply.
"Somersaults?" the pirate said, "That be incredble! How many would it be doin' then?"
"That would depend on how hard I slap him."
From: Just me reworking old jokes · Link hearrrre!