On July 4, 2006, scurvy dog jennifer brown breath said:
What does a pirate say when he has a heart attack?
Arrr! Me heartie!
From: Who knows? · Link hearrrre!
Every joke in the hold
Showing jokes 31–45 of 995 scurvy jokes.
On May 13, 2006, the sea-bitten Richard Kupfer said:
How many pirate jokes are lame?
Most of them ARR!
From: My mind · Link hearrrre!
On January 23, 2009, seven-sea sailin' Alex Fantastico said:
What kind of ships do pirates have trouble with?
Relationships!
From: Made it up for Pirate Christmas! · Link hearrrre!
On February 21, 2015, one-legged Anthony Nichols said:
Why did the pirate ask to get a mortgage with 3.142 percent interest?
He wanted the pi-rate!
From: Myself · Link hearrrre!
On December 7, 2008, barnacle-bitten Jason Hill said:
What did the pirate say to man who insulted him?
I know you ARR, but what am AYE?!!!!
From: Heard it around the interblags · Link hearrrre!
On August 23, 2010, one-eyed Dean Mehling said:
As a child, I was made to walk the plank. We couldn't afford a dog.
From: Emo Phillips · Link hearrrre!
On March 15, 2006, captain Cap'n Karikas said:
What's really a pirate's favorite letter?
P! Because it's an R, but it's missing a leg!
From: www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=mmmmiKo · Link hearrrre!
On September 18, 2013, scurvy knave Beth Sparks said:
How does a pirate ask for a date?
Arrrr you busy tonight?
From: My niece, at age 9 · Link hearrrre!
On September 19, 2005, the most piratical Cap'n Karikas said:
What does a Dyslexic Pirate Say?
RRAAAAAAAAAAA!
From: http://www.ratemypiratejoke.com/rate/showjoke.jsp?id=61 · Link hearrrre!
On October 17, 2005, scurvy knave Tim said:
So, there's this pirate ship in the midst of a long voyage. The men have grown terribly bored. A pirate amongst them happens to know a bunch of magic tricks, and he decides to put on a magic show. His parrot, however, is quite gossipy and can't keep it's mouth shut.
The pirate begins his first trick, and tha parrot gives it away by saying "rawwk, the coin is in the other hand, rawwk!"
Frustrated, the pirate tries another trick, but again, the parrot gives it away by blurting out "rawwk, look under the table, rawwk!"
This goes on for some time, to a point that the pirate can't manage to perform anything spectacular to entertain the crew. His anger towards his blabbermouth parrot eventually grows so phenomenal that one night he gets very drunk and accidentally crashes the ship into some rocks.
Sobering up the next morning, he finds himself adrift on some wreckage. The parrot, ever the attentive sidekick, happens to land next to him looking quite puzzled. It says to him:
"Rawwk, Okay, I give up, What'd ya do with the boat?"
The pirate begins his first trick, and tha parrot gives it away by saying "rawwk, the coin is in the other hand, rawwk!"
Frustrated, the pirate tries another trick, but again, the parrot gives it away by blurting out "rawwk, look under the table, rawwk!"
This goes on for some time, to a point that the pirate can't manage to perform anything spectacular to entertain the crew. His anger towards his blabbermouth parrot eventually grows so phenomenal that one night he gets very drunk and accidentally crashes the ship into some rocks.
Sobering up the next morning, he finds himself adrift on some wreckage. The parrot, ever the attentive sidekick, happens to land next to him looking quite puzzled. It says to him:
"Rawwk, Okay, I give up, What'd ya do with the boat?"
From: Not sure.... · Link hearrrre!
On April 20, 2010, the dreaded Aaarrr(ggghhh)ron Hrcka said:
Why did the pirate have trouble keeping his car on the road?
Because the road was SCURVY!!!
From: From me self · Link hearrrre!
On September 17, 2015, the scurvy Sonny A. said:
What does a pirate do when he's too wasted to get back to his ship?
He uses his ayePhone to call Uberrrrr.
From: Half original/ half I looted from other pirates · Link hearrrre!
On June 12, 2005, captain joyce said:
How much did the pirate pay for his piercings?
A buck-an-ear!
From: told to me a few years ago... · Link hearrrre!
On September 19, 2005, barnacle-bitten Cap'n Karikas said:
Where can you find a pirate who has lost his wooden legs?
Right where you left him.
From: http://www.ratemypiratejoke.com/rate/showjoke.jsp?id=56 · Link hearrrre!
On August 10, 2007, the sea-bitten The-Captin-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named said:
One pirate said to his fellow crewmate, "Arrrgh, that be a fine looking hook and peg leg ye got for ye'self!"
The pirate replied, "I should think so, it cost me and arm and a leg!"
The pirate replied, "I should think so, it cost me and arm and a leg!"