On September 26, 2008, the grog-addicted Tessy said:
What did the pirate say when his wooden leg got stuck in the freezer?
Shiver me timbers!
From: My ingenios pirotic mind · Link hearrrre!
Every joke in the hold
Showing jokes 16–30 of 995 scurvy jokes.
On April 7, 2010, one-eyed man said:
What kind of grades did the pirate get in school?
HIGH SEAS!
From: ESPN's Sportsnation · Link hearrrre!
On March 14, 2010, one-legged Belladonna said:
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be bagels!
From: Common sense · Link hearrrre!
On November 17, 2010, land-lubber First Mate Albert said:
What's the difference between a hungry pirate and a drunken pirate?
One's a rumbling tummy, and the other's a tumbling rummy!
From: The briny depths of my ARRmagination. · Link hearrrre!
On September 19, 2006, land-lubber Genevieve Atkerson said:
Why is pirating addictive?
They say once ye lose yer first hand, ye get hooked!
From: Genevieve Atkerrrson · Link hearrrre!
On February 25, 2008, scurvy dog iiawg the terrible! said:
How do pirates know that they are pirates?
They think, therefore they ARRRR!!!!!
From: I made it up. · Link hearrrre!
On March 24, 2005, land-lubber Cap'n Karikas said:
A pirate and his parrot, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a valiant battle. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, the pirate stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a Genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of the castaways, a Genie came forth. This particular Genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving any thought to the matter the pirate blurted out, "Make the entire ocean into rum!" The Genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into the finest rum ever sampled by mortals. Simultaneously, the Genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of rum on the hull broke the stillness as the two considered their circumstances
The parrot looked disgustedly at the pirate and after a tension-filled moment spoke: "Now yee've done it!! Now we're goon to have to pee in the boat!"
The parrot looked disgustedly at the pirate and after a tension-filled moment spoke: "Now yee've done it!! Now we're goon to have to pee in the boat!"
From: http://www.evilkid.com/licensing/pyratequeen/jokes.html · Link hearrrre!
On August 14, 2006, one-legged Scott said:
Why couldn't the pirates play cards?
The captain was standing on the deck!
From: somewhere humourous... · Link hearrrre!
On March 15, 2006, regular scallywag Cap'n Karikas said:
A pirate walks into a bar wearing a paper towel on his head. He sits down at the bar and orders some dirty rum.
The bartender asks, "Why are you wearing a paper towel?"
"Arrr..." says the pirate. "I've got a bounty on me head!"
The bartender asks, "Why are you wearing a paper towel?"
"Arrr..." says the pirate. "I've got a bounty on me head!"
From: WonTon's mom · Link hearrrre!
On May 13, 2014, the most piratical Medicine Moll said:
What is a pirate's least favourite vegetable?
Leeks!
From: Spanish waters · Link hearrrre!
On July 22, 2010, the most piratical James Craven said:
Why did the pirate go to the Apple store?
To buy an iPatch! (Aye Patch)
From: Colin Cowherd, ESPN SportsNation · Link hearrrre!
On February 16, 2010, regular scallywag Angel said:
What's a pirate's favorite letter?
You think it's the RRRRR, but it's the C that they're in love with!
Aye.
Aye.
From: Captain Yarrrrley · Link hearrrre!
On September 28, 2007, scurvy knave The BOBS Fan said:
What do you call a pirate with two eyes and two legs?
Rookie!
From: Me own charred remains of a brain · Link hearrrre!
On July 27, 2006, the sea-bitten Jim V. said:
Did you hear about the pirate who took up boxing?
He had a killer left hook!
From: Inspired by a "Rhymes With Orange" comic · Link hearrrre!
On January 23, 2014, the dreaded Morien Jones said:
What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?
I, I, R, and the 7 Cs.